Baker Academic

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

The Top Ten Blurbs that I Didn’t Write for Joel L. Watts’s Mimetic Criticism and the Gospel of Mark – Le Donne

10. The English-speaking world is divided into two categories: those who have read Mimetic Criticism and the Gospel of Mark and those who have never heard of Mimetic Criticism and the Gospel of Mark.

9. In an age of skepticization, curmudgeonry, and other made-up words, Joel L. Watts uses language that the average reader will find in most dictionaries.

8. An instant classic! is a an oxymoron that no one should use. Scholars and pastors alike should avoid such phrases.  Instead, read this book!

7. Clearly conceived and intentionally typed, Watts wrote this book. Like all great classics of English literature, Mimetic Criticism and the Gospel of Mark reads from left to right.

6. Me like book. Book good. FIRE BAD!!! But book good.

5. Joel L. Watts’ book gave my historiography a needed colonoscopy.

4. Henceforth all students of the Gospel of Mark, if they hope to read every book ever written about Mark, and if they wish to say with honesty that they have read every book about Mark, will have to read this book.

3. Mimetic Criticism and the Gospel of Mark will change the rotation of planets, save drowning babies, burn bras, and return the hearts of the children to their fathers. Joel L. Watts has quickly established himself as the Neil Diamond of New Testament studies.

2. This book is sure to be numbered among the top ten-thousand books that Wipf and Stock will publish in 2013.

…and the number one blurb that I didn’t write for Joel Watts:

1. Mimetic Criticism and the Gospel of Mark is destined to become a standard text.

All joking aside, Mimetic Criticism and the Gospel of Mark is surprisingly original and I enjoyed it a great deal. I hope that my real blurb will help to give the book the reception it deserves. Congrats Joel.



  1. All I've read so far is the book's title, and per your blurb 9, I'm already below average. SIGH. I've always suspected this, but my mother used to say such nice things about me. But maybe there's hope for me, because after 5 minutes of determined internet research, I've figured out that Mr. Watts' book is not intentionally imitative of other Mark criticism.

    1. Don't worry Larry, this book is loaded with cliches - you'll love it.

    2. Anthony, that's insightful! Up until now, I'd found my admiration for your work to be inexplicable.

  2. I thought about making it game to discover the hidden cliches, etc... They can get a candy bar or something.

  3. good lord.... the apocalypse is at hand.